this may not be the place but...

[v2rocket]

well, basically....theres this girl. and this girl she has extremely strict parents. her parents found out i've been meeting thier daughter to hang out. now they probably hate me. her father is a military man and religious. he called my phone and left a slightly angry message, for me to never see his daughter and for me to call him back. now what do i do? i want him to know that im sorry, and that im not just some punk teenage kid just trying to get in his daughters pants. so im thinking of inviting him out to dinner with his wife for them to get a chance to meet and talk to me.

i really dont know how im going to phrase the message and i really dont know how to act but i do know that manning up to undermining him is alot better than hiding away like most people.

what are your thoughts guys? i really want some help on this one:(

[TequilaRyan]

Two things


One: Call him back and tell him straight out your looking to hit it... Just kidding


Two: Dont worry about the dad hes not going to touch you. so go over and introduce yourself. then go back to #1 :tup:

[beehotch619]

as a guy with a girlfriend with strict parents i say dont wast any time, the longer you take to call him back, the guiltier you look. also my dad is in the military, and old military guys enjoy intimidation and being in power, so 1) try your very best to not seem afraid no matter what and 2) ask him for permission to date her, hell probably respect you a little more after you do this. be truthful, it always works, unless your a douche who really just wants to get in her pants, and in this case i dont think its worth a beating... hope i helped... :tup:

[18tMiCo]

as a guy with a girlfriend with strict parents i say dont wast any time, the longer you take to call him back, the guiltier you look. also my dad is in the military, and old military guys enjoy intimidation and being in power, so 1) try your very best to not seem afraid no matter what and 2) ask him for permission to date her, hell probably respect you a little more after you do this. be truthful, it always works, unless your a douche who really just wants to get in her pants, and in this case i dont think its worth a beating... hope i helped... :tup:

i agree. Honesty always works. If you are serious about this relationship, I would suggest you to meet up with them as you said, and this usually will tell them that you are not dating her just for her body and you have the courage to face them because you love her and talk out the problems.

[madajb]

How old are you, and how old is she, because honestly, if you're both over 18 then it's your own damn business if you date.

-ajb

[bugzy]

i still think talking to parents is very respectable

[br14n22]

You say: Hello sir, I regret that I have to introduce myself under these circumstances, but my name is so and so, and i am this many years, and I go to this school. I want you to know that I have nothing but the best intentions with your daughter, and I would like to have time to get to know her names family. I would love if we could all go out to dinner sometime so that we have some time to talk and get to know eachother. I apologize if her name has deceived you, and I am making this call so that you are aware that I am an honest person, and etc.

Or something to that effect.

[fcastle]

How old are you, and how old is she, because honestly, if you're both over 18 then it's your own damn business if you date.

-ajb

I would also like to know this.

Another question, you knew about this home situation before hand? If so you blew it already, you should have been on his doorstep from the beginning, not wait til he finds out. That said, you have to go over there. Yeah, you can call, but I find it's better to face people.

It can still work out, like someone else said, show no fear.

I once dated a girl who's father was in the Military and he wasn't sure he liked minorities too much (to put it nicely), but I won him over. Good luck. :tup:

(You are really trying to get into her pants though right? It would be a shame to go thru all that just to hang out.)

[DTolo]

Well, I am in the military and I had a serious relationship with a girl who's dad was a Marine in Vietnam, He liked the intimidation tactics. Best bet is to be straight forward and like has been said before, don't show fear or intimidation. He will respect you for that. Usually guys who aren't in for meeting the parents are the guys he is looking to scare away if you know what I mean. If you get passed the gaurd he is putting up and show that you are not trying to hide alterior motives then you will be cool. With my ex, I was straight forward with her parents, even when the answer wasn't what they wanted to hear, but it was the truth. I earned a lot of trust like that. Just don't abuse it!

[nanobot6]

If they are that strict dont go behind their backs just go to them.

[Spyders03]

Agreed. you need to go to them. taking them out to dinner is a great idea, something like denny's would be awsome! ;) but seriously, take them somewhere that is not too expensive, but somewhere you can talk to them. I am in the military, and the older military guys do love the intimidation. I agree with everyone else, if you talk to him and tell him what is going on, just be honest and not afraid and you'll be fine, and he will respect you very much. Good luck.

[mitssn]

Get her pregnant... Then you HAVE to be in her life.

[robvel80]

Call this lady up, she seems to have all the answers!!!


1-800-DRLAURA (1-800-375-2872). :D

http://www.cfun.com/dr-laura-portrait.jpg

[OCbuiltGTI]

Call this lady up, she seems to have all the answers!!!


1-800-DRLAURA (1-800-375-2872). :D

http://www.cfun.com/dr-laura-portrait.jpg

I hope for your sake that you are kidding...

:D :D :D

[v2rocket]

were both 18

well i called him, yeah he likes his intimidation tactics. oddly he also likes to give me a glimpse of hope or some sort of test to accomplish to show im really serious....

he says if i still feel the same about her after college then i can come to his doorstep and meet him.

and goddamnit im gunna play by his rules and show him im more than what he thinks of me, because im one determined person.

[DTolo]

were both 18

well i called him, yeah he likes his intimidation tactics. oddly he also likes to give me a glimpse of hope or some sort of test to accomplish to show im really serious....

he says if i still feel the same about her after college then i can come to his doorstep and meet him.

and goddamnit im gunna play by his rules and show him im more than what he thinks of me, because im one determined person.

I am willing to bet his college statement is something he is using to push the problem off even further, probably out of his own worry and healthy fear for his own daughter. If he mentioned that you may come to his "doorstep" then he is saying he is welcoming you for a chance to be in his house. It also means he is turning a blind eye to whether you and his daughter see eachother outside of their home. He'll know what's going on but won't let you know what he knows. If you stay on good terms and he sees how happy his daughter is with you, out of his own security he will want to be a part of whatever is making his daughter happy. Plus if she is too happy, he'll want you closer to keep a better eye on you. I was able to go into my ex's house because I new her older sis and her mom and they allowed it, but the first interaction I had with her dad, he invited me into his bedroom to go through his gun collection with me. He wanted to pull me a lil closer yet still implement his intimidation/scare tactic. If you like her, stay in there and persistant, and use respect at all times.

[v2rocket]

thanks guys =]

[madajb]

were both 18

Then you're both adults and can date who you please.
Absolutely you can be polite when you interact with him, but make it very clear that you and his daughter are dating and it is not subjec to his approval or consent.

You also might want to think twice about dating a girl who can't stand up to her own parents. There is nothing but drama down that road...

-ajb

[fcastle]

Then you're both adults and can date who you please.
Absolutely you can be polite when you interact with him, but make it very clear that you and his daughter are dating and it is not subjec to his approval or consent.

You also might want to think twice about dating a girl who can't stand up to her own parents. There is nothing but drama down that road...

-ajb

OMG, a little off topic, but you mentioned the drama. Check this out. Friend of mine marries this chick that is totally under her parents thumb (she's in her mid 20's with a curfew, WTF?). Now I find out that SHE'S slapping HIM around? A little repressed anger from the ol' childhood I guess. I figured I'd get him a copy of Men Don't Cry (great movie, hilarious).

[LAZY TURBO]

Two things


One: Call him back and tell him straight out your looking to hit it... Just kidding


Two: Dont worry about the dad hes not going to touch you. so go over and introduce yourself. then go back to #1 :tup:


i totally agree

[chris]

as a guy with a girlfriend with strict parents i say dont wast any time, the longer you take to call him back, the guiltier you look. also my dad is in the military, and old military guys enjoy intimidation and being in power, so 1) try your very best to not seem afraid no matter what and 2) ask him for permission to date her, hell probably respect you a little more after you do this. be truthful, it always works, unless your a douche who really just wants to get in her pants, and in this case i dont think its worth a beating... hope i helped... :tup:

Agreed!!! Give him a call back and just be open and honest with him.

[Nefarious]

quick question: what are your guys ethnicity? Only reason I ask is because it sounds as if she might be of asian decent in which case all american logic goes out the window. If this is the case let me know I promise I can help you with this.

[mike]

If she still lives at home, she has to respect the rules of the house hold, but outside the house is another story, you are both adults and if she can't stand up to her father to date who she wants, then are you that important to her? That is a bad sign, been there done that.

[v2rocket]

quick question: what are your guys ethnicity? Only reason I ask is because it sounds as if she might be of asian decent in which case all american logic goes out the window. If this is the case let me know I promise I can help you with this.

yup shes a filipina girl....

and her mom though i talked to her n shes really cool she kind of passed it off as nothing really. its her dad whos got a baby crammed up his ass:p

[DTolo]

ALL that I have said still applies. Just show your effort, my wife is Chinese, and I have dealt with the same.

[Nefarious]

There is a very good chance that no matter what you do you will not be accepted unless your married. Is she an only child and/or the only daughter? Either or both of those will make the process even more painstaking.

Just be respectful through out the whole process and you'll be fine.

[DTolo]

There is a very good chance that no matter what you do you will not be accepted unless your married. Is she an only child and/or the only daughter? Either or both of those will make the process even more painstaking.

Just be respectful through out the whole process and you'll be fine.


What he said.

[mike]

I got all of you beat..............................I dated a latina who was the only child! My white ass was treated like a terror suspect, I got the third degree from the whole familia. I was always over at her house, her mom could COOK!!!!!

[Nefarious]

I got all of you beat..............................I dated a latina who was the only child! My white ass was treated like a terror suspect, I got the third degree from the whole familia. I was always over at her house, her mom could COOK!!!!!


Not that this is a competition but I'll play:

I'm getting married in 9 days (www.jasonandrobin.net) to a woman who is 1st gen Vietnamese and the only child. Her parents are still trying to convince her not to marry me. :mad:

[mike]

oh damn..........................................cong rats!!!! are you guys running off and getting married? Or did you hire a security firm to keep the peace?

[madajb]

Not that this is a competition but I'll play:

I'm getting married in 9 days (www.jasonandrobin.net) to a woman who is 1st gen Vietnamese and the only child. Her parents are still trying to convince her not to marry me. :mad:

Bah, that ain't nothin'.

I married a girl my age of the same race, from the same economic class, from the same social group in the same town at the same school.

Talk about a tough time adjusting...
heh.

-ajb

[Nefarious]

Bah, that ain't nothin'.

I married a girl my age of the same race, from the same economic class, from the same social group in the same town at the same school.

Talk about a tough time adjusting...
heh.

-ajb


How did you manage. That would have driven me insane. :D

[protijy337]

yup shes a filipina girl....

and her mom though i talked to her n shes really cool she kind of passed it off as nothing really. its her dad whos got a baby crammed up his ass:p


ah be happy he's just strict I dated a girl who's dad was a Drunk strict jerk.... (this was in highschool) He hated me! I was 17 drop a 67' Camaro (car was 350hp of tire spinning fun).

one night after 6 months of dealing with his BS and sneeking our him (his daughter was a freak BTW and my first incedice with this guy we were 1/2 naked in his bed when he came hope and I jumped out a 2nd story window :D )

I come to her house to drop her off, she gets out starts walkin in He comes out Beer in hand, he wants to go for a ride :) So I drive around the block, sideways the whole way with him screaming like a lill girl saying STOP THIS CAR STOP THIS CAR! I'm like ahahahahahahahaha :smokem:

I come to a skidding stop in front of his house My g'friend still out front with a look of horror on her face, he opens the door falls out of the car, and I lay down a 20 ft strip leaving him on his face in a cloud of tire smoke :tup: :D


She was pissed, he didn't remember and I.......That day will always live in imfamy with me....


PS she turned out to be a crazy bitch, but most do ;)

[DTolo]

I have to admit, I didn't even meet my wife's parents until we were married and she was pregnant! Her dad demanded to see the marriage license to prove we got married and I was not trying to trick her. Yes she was prego b4 we got married but the wedding plans were made before she got preg.

[Fritz]

a sheltered good girl going to college that has open access to booze/drugs/sex/booze/drugs/sex... yea, the old man should reconsider his decision about you.. better you than some drunk loser

[v2rocket]

a sheltered good girl going to college that has open access to booze/drugs/sex/booze/drugs/sex... yea, the old man should reconsider his decision about you.. better you than some drunk loser

Is she an only child and/or the only daughter?

thanks frittz:tup: i totally agree, im not sure if i stated i talked to her mom but at least im on good terms with her too bad the house is run by the wannabe bigshot a**hole.

i talked to her and she kind of misses me which i think is good still :) she said she was sorry and i told her that she shouldnt be because its not her fault.

and no she is not an only child she is the 2nd in line of 4
1:oldest daughter *acts like another father/parental unit, but likes the anime i give the lil bros.
2: her :tup:
3&4: her twin lil bros. 100% chill with me kuz i give em free anime and stuff

theyre all 1 year apart too, so the youngest is 17 and the oldest is 19 and the boys have thier life easy as pie.